REVIEW
Every Time We Say Goodbye is another heart penetrating novel by Natalie Jenner. When I read one of her books, I cannot help but write copious amounts of notes. There are numerous lines of profound wisdom, complexity of thought on societal issues, poetic and literary insight, intense interactions and behavioural observations on the pages. Natalie makes me think and dig deeper to grasp the truths that are often hidden under layers of facades. In Every Time We Say Goodbye, I was moved by the complexity of the characters, their situations and lessons learned. And even though this is a fictional world, the astute realism is unforgettable and far-reaching.
Natalie’s stories, like with Jane Austen’s, focus on the importance of friendships and family. And Every Time We Say Goodbye is no exception. In fact, her current novel takes us through the horrors of war and how it affects those important relationships. The sense of loss is truly felt through Vivien and others. Whether from known deaths on the battlefield or of loved ones gone missing in action. It awakens in us core emotions and makes us wonder how we would react in the same situations.
This story poses the question: how do we move forward after war has invaded our lives? Especially since it can change a person—not always for the better. Finding closure for the living can be hard. Tabitha has experienced the loss of freedom and her home. Not something Vivi had suffered but ‘she did understand the unique pain of not knowing what has happened to someone you love.’ As she says: ‘There is nowhere for the grief to go; there is nothing to move on from.’ These two women’s experiences are different but they both share the outcome: 'How could she trust anyone or rely upon the appearance of things that could vanish.’
Too often people get stuck in a cycle of grief and anger. This is a big part of Vivien’s journey. And the message that Sister Justina delivers to Vivi forces her to look at her beliefs. Does she really need to change to survive? And what has it changed her into? War has affected her deeply but the nun says don’t change so much you lose your own self. Those who fought in the war ‘lived and died as they believed. There must be faith…’ Changing because of anger serves no good purpose. Vivi has felt the horrid effects of war and it has made her angry because of all she lost: including a marriage to a man she loved profoundly. As she said to Claudia: ‘We would have been married but for the war.’
War can make a person feel helpless. Unable to control the narrative. ‘The blame fed her (Vivi’s) anger and the anger fuelled her writing...’ She could control the story and outcome on paper-–exact revenge and ‘she could write a complete, if not happy, ending.’ Vivi as a writer, is also a woman of observations. The people she encounters in her search to find answers of what happened to her fiance, David, leave her with more questions and meanings to sort through. I found Sister Justina’s conversations very moving and certainly her advice to Vivi very helpful. And her friend, actress Claudia, throws a few curve balls that also contribute to her awareness of the effects of life choices and learning to be true to yourself. What is the secret ingredient missing in their lives? Vivi eventually learns once she understands Claudia’s choice and what it really means. And how she herself has forgotten a simple truth on her journey of survival. Although Vivien has learned much about the horrors of war and how it can rob you of hope and trust, she wants to honour David’s eternal optimism, his thoughtful and generous heart. And so, her journey leads her to turn a corner…
There are many comments in this novel on war— that it is ‘a fearful following of destruction’. Even a great loss of trust between people. And people are forced to make difficult decisions—never knowing what is the best solution. As Levi states: he ‘didn’t feel there was much choice at all.’ Who could he trust? There is a repeat of this question throughout the novel. And there are so many harbouring secrets of the past. Levi, like many, tried to save casualties along the way. In this case, he was trying to save a baby who lost a family. He became this baby’s protector so when the child is taken from his arms to safety, it hits him hard. It’s that need for the human touch, connection and family preservation that bursts through during the battles. Keeping siblings together. Maintaining the bonds. All the important things ‘that tether us together’, when threats come fast and hard.
War causes division, despair and distrust. As previously mentioned, the novel shows the importance of family (and friends) which is very much a Jane Austen concern. These kind of relationships have a positive impact on the developing individual. Where is it we learn trust first—if not between child and mother or father and with our siblings? Vivi has had no experience with children but when an eight year old asks her how will she know when she can trust someone, Vivien says she will know the more she lives and the more she meets people. Experience and gut extinct will help us identify it. But war can rob individuals of that vital support structure.
Vivi feels such a strong loss when her actress friend Claudia leaves. She tries to reckon this pain. ‘After all, friends (are) not family.’ But aren’t they in some small way when you let them enter your heart, take them into your confidence and trust? I think Vivi is trying to make sense of this. She feels a great loss of friendship as goodbyes are often forever because friends will make choices that take them away. (The book’s title is so apt.) Vivi misses that bond with another. Again, like Jane Austen, the importance of female friendships for women abounds here. Claudia’s honest advice when she tells Vivien ‘whatever you do—do it with your eyes wide open and a little less anger’ is a wonderful by-product of their close friendship.
We see other glimpses of Jane Austen’s beliefs in Vivien and David’s relationship. That mutual attraction in Marriage is more important than money or position. Vivien experienced the negative effects of social class restrictions in her fiancé’s family. Their engagement would never be accepted. They were twenty one and ‘fiercely in love’ and she resented ‘being made to feel common in any way.’ Vivien was stylish and attractive and a high achiever—graduating at the top of her year on a full scholarship. There was nothing ordinary or inferior about her. David was an Oxford man but he was expected to take over his family’s vast estate. Born to a titled family meant he had limited choices—including who could be his spouse. Ironically, though David’s lineage boasted longevity and their moto was for the ‘family to succeed at all costs’— their restrictive views caused them to miss the most important ingredient—love. (And losing out on their grandchild.)
This novel covers so many things: including the cinematic world. Other great lines are ‘movies are a business’ and ‘No one says no to Ava Gardner’. We meet Sophia Loren and others on the glittering stage. We get a glimpse of the culture of the 1950s. The Prohibition era, American Jazz and speakeasy ambience—these are all sprinkled across the canvas of this literary painting. And not to mention the Vatican. The exploration of good and evil. Natalie covers a lot of territory.
The devastating effects of Hitler’s regime—the countless deaths—the attempted extermination of a race of people, causes Vivi to wonder if ‘this cancer of the mind’ can ever be removed from the world. But there have been brave souls who have resisted. This is a painful and honest portrayal of war and its effects. The loss of trust, hope and happiness. But it also exposes a war closer to home in the social classes. And so there are many battles between the heart and head.
In Every Time We Say Goodbye I was taken by the depth of the characters, their development and their journeys to find the answers in life they sought. Many of the cast were memorable and although punctuated with human frailty, possessed heroic hearts. Vivien finds her answers and those revelations are quite different than expected. There are surprises and sorrows and healing and grace… The engine that runs the story is found on this line: ‘Nothing could be created from the emptiness of scorn—to create, there had to be hope.’ ‘Hope that we as humans, could be better—could do better.’ Vivien realises in that moment ‘what she, Levi, Curtis, Nino—all of them at work with tales false and true—were really searching for.’
I highly recommend Every Time We Say Goodbye that I could not pull away from—even when the drama seized and shook my heart. A brilliant story that should not be missed. 5 Big Stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Thanks to St Martin’s Press & Netgalley for my review copy.
